lavivi | (no subject) (Reply)

*DIES LAUGHING*

Dumbledore is in his office, being very wise.

""Tis a strange tale, thee doth tell." He says, nodding wisely.

"Uh, Sir, why are you talking like that?"

"Alas, 'tis the teenage fanfic authors. When they try to make me not sound like a sixteen-year-old American, I inevitably end up sounding ridiculous. Methinks I must always be-eth a bad imitation of what is supposed to be Shakespeare, or talk like Yoda, I do. Apparently my wisdom is such that it can only be expressed through truly appalling grammar."

"So, what do we do about the time traveling?" Asks Hermione.

"Alas, tell you, I will not."

"But, why not? Don't you know?"

"Of course I do. I know everything. But if I just fixed everything, which I am perfectly capable of doing mind you, there would be no time for ye olde cliched subplot of romance. Besides, I prefer to watch thee all bungle it up and laugh at thee. Forsooth."

"So what do we do?"

"I dunno. Probably thou should to to the library and look for a book called "What To Do If You've Broken Your Time-Turner And Travelled Back To Your Parents School Days And Are Really Sexy" or something of the sort. Then thou shalt probably have to go and search for some magical object to take thee back, but the plot will never get that far because thou shalt all be too busy snogging each other. Hark! That's the most important thing, thou must snog."