( A Blind Wolf Still Has Teeth )
And I'm signed up again for this year's round for less_for_you exchange again. Actually looking forward to it. And I'm writing a ficlet for an ASoIaF exchange, yay.
As always, I have a million and one Hellsing WIPs and small pieces. I one day may decide to post a couple.
So, this is a fic I wrote v. quickly this spring in order to give to pojypojy when I met her for the second time in Italy. ♥ I knew she liked Ned/Lyanna, and I am not averse to writing incest. So I wrote it trying to match it to two of her artworks - the second and third on this page. And afterwards she painted another (non-spoilery for my fic) for me.
(I firmly believe it's far from perfect, but I actually really do like the ending, particularly the last paragraph.)
Without further ado!
Title: Love is Sweet, Dearest Ned
Rating: R for graphic sexual stuff (omg, Lavinia actually posts some of the smut she wrote)
Word count: 3,450
Summary: Lyanna is fifteen and really would not rather get married at all, so she brings Ned into her angst. This may become a habit.
( Who would you have for me? )
(Which is actually a distressing feeling - I still love my first OTP and don't want to drop them in any way, and while the new canon is certainly love, I still feel like I'm letting it defeat me.... But that has nothing to do with these two stories which are fucking gold, a million times better than anything I'll write anytime soon.)
And then I got to this quote...
( spoilery )
Randomly, I got another plot bunny as I was writing my insane review (my difficulty with having Lily genuinely prefer James to Severus - but what if he damaged her so much she prefers his complete opposite, the fluffy ridiculous manly type? - Oddly enough, yes, the idea of him "damaging her so much" still appeals to me). *strokes chin* I may still want to stick to drabble-like, vignettes, or other not really full or serious fics for a while, though. It's exhausting to tackle the full concept of their relationship, explaining everything from beginning to end with canon. Much easier, of course, to assume it's all fact from beginning and then just examine certain particulars about it....
So now, yeah, I don't want to write make-out scenes, I want to write full-on SMUT. :D Painful, awkward, and yet really hot smut. Mmmmmm.
Kyouya is amused at me.
The story I mentioned in my last entry. W00t. A number of brilliant things (like a title! A real title, on a level with Mischief Managed!) came together at once, and it was fantastic.
Other author notes: Betaed by the excellent givemethechild. I've missed her as a beta. The story referenced is The Man-eating Tree by Phil Robinson.
Feedback is such love.
(I ended up rationalizing it into sense. Sigh.)
I can't believe, though, that I've posted three fics - two longstanding WIPs - in the last week or so. WTF. Here's to 2008 being productive as the last week, heh. Particularly for Out of the Dungeon and my nightmare-story (yeah, ought to make a resolution about a certain word count a month for that).
What was hitherto always known as "the crazy bathtub scene" - now dubiously titled Calculations of Worth - is posted. *preens*
AND. I think there will be another posting TOMORROW, from another eternal WIP (the post-funeral scene). W00t. Once I decide on a title that isn't hideously stupid. (No, Lavinia, you really shouldn't call it By the Way, a Vampire Ate My Uncle. You shouldn't.)
It's like my fourth attempt of the night, but I really like it - and it has a bit of mystery that's really, really obvious to anyone who remotely knows me, hem. Also, my tags may or may not give it away. And yes, it's exactly 100 words!
They are passionate. They have their own private armies. They are bespectacled, and they are absolutely, ruthlessly determined not to let anything stop them from their highest goals. They command a frightening amount of power, in their respectively secret ways, and they have honor which prevents them from misusing it…too much.
They have never before met anyone of the opposite sex whom they could truly call an equal.
Walter poured more tea for Tamaki, who sniffed and blinked sorrowfully up at him. “Walter…do you think they’re…in love?”
Walter sighed. "Only in, if I may use the term, a narcissistic fashion."
I finally managed to get somewhere with my funeral-detail angst. Nothing about modern British knights' funeral, mind you, but just general funeral stuff, since my knowledge was sadly lacking. I've made an alarming number of funeral-planning type searches in the past hour, if anyone happened to check my history. But, it was much more cheering to me than I imagine it would be to most doing the same searches; I have made DECISIONS, solved problems, and discovered about fifteen more ways for plausible angst. *cackles*
And, to finish it off, I've just learned a bit about the Anglican Church. cleo2584 was correct in that many priests are called Father; but their actual title is Reverend, and I'm going to defy the norm in sticking with that, since it didn't take me long to realize how awkward and even unnecessarily angsty it would be for Integra to address him as "Father" as she discusses her own father's funeral, and that is what she always called her own father, so yeah.
In case it isn't clear, this is Out of the Dungeon which I still hold so close to me.
And this is really exciting; I'm surmounting some problems I've had since the v. beginning, and so many more ideas and scenes are opening up - I'm not worrying about what'll fill the next few days of the story anymore. And it answers givemethechild's doubt when she read a particular scene.
One of the best links for my benefit. And of course, Wikipedia on Anglican ministers.
So yes, yay, I've cheered, now back to doing it.
So it's been kinda nice - I keep getting notifications that Welcome Home has been favorited. I understand that it isn't "omg this is one of the best stories I've ever read," but probably just from a shippy perspective - "oh look, this is something kinda sexy to read when I'm in the mood." Nevertheless, people do find it worth saving, and that's nice.
HOWEVER, I only have three reviews, when definitely more than that favorited it. This is maddening. You find it worth bookmarking; say something to me! WHY are you saving it - what parts did you like? PLEASE. Give me an idea, and I may write MORE like it!
But I did not start an entry to rant about that. I started an entry to squee over awesome Review #3.
That was totally delicious :PI just love how they were relaxing on the bed, debating on how much they had really missed the other.
(Icon represents me on my WIPs.)
Integra arrives home for the summer, and Alucard is waiting for her. Strange things happen when you are fifteen.
For the WIN.
(Also, if you join integral_art, you can see the gorgeous art Jean drew for it. TOO GORGEOUS FOR THE CHANCE PASSERBY.)
Drabbles next, hopefully. Along with the usual myriad of other WIPs. All hopefully.
Have a different new fic, though - A Last New Year's Eve. redandthewolf is proving to be amazing for me. If only my New Year's resolution had been a community. Well, I know what to do next year.
But look at the really, really, really nice review I got for it, from bratanimus:
Wow. I mean, really, WOW. I really, really liked this. You have a way with the physical actions of the characters, and impact of the environment; you know how to bring a scene to life. Remus rubbing his tongue on the roof of his mouth, Lily bouncing on her arm, the wall trembling behind them at the end, etc etc etc. Very vivid, very alive.Best I've gotten in a while, honestly.
Even the exposition was evocative and complete, giving us tastes of other characters even though they are not the focus: Harry had a wonderful ability to make him forget unpleasant things. A sort of obliviator-field, as Sirius called it. So succinct and wonderful.
The hand holding and the "I love you's" actually took my breath away, which is something to be said for a fic. I adored the ending, from And what does one say through the end. The last sentence was so incredibly evocative.
And of course excellent use of the prompt. Such an economical piece, succinct and vibrant -- a fabulous snapshot of two people clinging to life, though love. I really, really loved this. Very glad you posted it. :D
But back to the icons. A count of what I have now:
- Five Hellsing (one general/Alucard, two Integra/Alucard [*ignores the specific Girlycard*], one Integra, one Walter)
- Four Ouran (two pure Kyouya, one Kyouya-Haruhi, one Tamaki-Kyouya)
- Three Harry Potter (*cough* - at least one Lily/Severus now, finally, a general one, and buttfacemakani/humor)
- Two general writing (one negative, one neutral) and one slightly angsty Violet-/Klaus. :D
I'm about two lines in, and already it feels like it's going to be so brilliant.
(So different from Hellsing and my Lily/Severus angst, y'know. Tamaki is SO MUCH FUN.)
I won't say much about it now, except that it's going to go into thk_ouran_ot3 when it's done (because it will be done, dammit).
Icon replacement ahead. This one actually isn't that inappropriate.
...And you know what would be really cool? An Ouran mood theme. Must investigate.
ETA: Oh, and it already has a title. How Haruhi Lost Her Fear of Thunder.
- Really, I don't have here a lily/severus tag or icon yet? WTF and shame on me.
...OH, that's because I never even linked my first submission for redandthewolf. Well, here it is now: Never Spoken, Never Forgotten.
Title: Stability, Safety, and Happiness
Summary: It was the insensible force of adolescent attraction, but it was strong and consuming and had carried them on for how many months now?
Rating: PG-13 (tiny bit of language)
Warnings: none but what we know happens in canon
Word Count: 1,738
Author’s Note: Okay, I like this better than my submission for the last challenge. A bit, anyway. And it's odd, isn't it, how I handle my OTP.... Reviews with however you truly feel will mean ever so much.
Anyway, this was my best go at Hermione/Theodore Nott - I didn't want to make it too challenging for myself.
It's not like I haven't had anything to update, either. I've written and posted fic. I have to, um, figure out what the last thing I posted here was - Mischief Managed?
Well, there's been two more posted Hellsing things:
- Afternoon Off, written last summer and not posted until this April because that's just how I do things. It was written as a present for Jean, to match an amusing (but wonderful) picture she drew.
- Sunday Morning Wake-Up (I want my title inspiration BACK): a v. short scene of mine and a very beautiful picture of Jean's.
Now redandthewolf is having their second challenge, and as I was looking over their prompts I got really excited and wrote some down as well as a start of five hundred words. So you'll hear more about that. Eventually.
And yeah, I haven't forgotten about nightmare-story or any of my other long-suffering (srsly) WIPs. They're...among my priorities.
Also, it seems like I've given up my SOS reviews, since I read Thomas Harris' Hannibal Lecter trilogy, loved it to pieces, and didn't review them. Meh. Well, SOS does stand for Supply of Sanity (or was it Store of Sanity?), created in a time of great need which I am fortunately no longer in.
Now, want to know the real reason for this entry?
Like many, I've been re-reading all the Harry Potter books in preparation for the seventh; right now I'm in chapter eight of the fifth book. But just a little earlier tonight I was in chapter seven, "The Ministry of Magic," closely reading the descriptions of all the floors in the Ministry (which I think are the coolest thing, y'know). And I got to Level Three, which is the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes including the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad, Obliviator Headquarters, and Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee.
Like a lot of things in Ms. Rowling's world, the obvious and most practical purpose a name suggests is not necessarily what it actually is. Some things are silly and ridiculous or just odd. In the names of the Ministry offices particularly, there seem to be a lot of hidden jokes. So I puzzled over this - do they handle lame excuses from law-breaking wizards/witches, and the name is a deliberate insult to Muggles? Is this a committee which actually creates Muggle-worthy excuses for other magical departments or whatever? And then it hit me: it's a committee that creates excuses to present to the Muggles involved in magical catastrophes or accidents.
Once grasped, I knew this had to be one of the most brilliant jobs in the wizarding world. Also, the committee must be almost entirely made up of Muggle-borns.
All day they receive news of catastrophes/accidents and invent the most plausible excuses for them Muggles would understand/believe. They must have to stay up on Muggle technology, for excuses about gas lines and, y'know, technology, and wow. Ooh, the fics that could be written about this committee. Seeing how it has to be almost entirely Muggle-born, it could also be the headquarters of a secret Muggle-born society, for whatever purpose you like, etc.
First, I re-read and edited my post-funeral scene (of Walter and Integra's big conversation - "Richard's a bastard traitor who tried to kill me but I shot him. Oh and by the way, Alucard's back"). It doesn't fail quite as much as I thought it did! Last main problem is perspective. DAMN PERSPECTIVE. Why can't we see how they're both feeling in one scene, huh. But I think it's fixed it up quite a bit, yay - will be emailing it again to my two lovely Hellsing girls (givemethechild andmortal_maiden) for further critiquing. And then posting!!! I so hope.
Now I am working on my old almost-sex scene. Siiiiigh. It's so conflicting. I don't understand how it can suck so much in places, and then be so incredibly decent to the point of possibly being described as "really quite good" in others. CONFLICTION. And both ways are really sunk quite deeply into the story, so re-writing is hard. It's so long and well-drawn-out for a PWP, too. Which gives me extra motivation for really fixing it up everywhere.
Have discovered through this that I have (perhaps mostly just had) a terrible tendency to write passively. Not always in the passive tense, but I can be so inclined to write things "elegantly" that involve long phrases and nicer words than normal ones, that it comes off detached. WTF, I just concritted an author about this the other day. I'm really glad I can recognize it in myself, though. Anyway, so am working on fixing that too.
Word count 3,539 for this one, and just over 2,000, I think, for the post-funeral scene.
(I want to start a new Lily/Severus piece too, just a glimpse of their relationship. Was inspired by this.)
P.S. Yes I still remember that thing called the nightmare-story. It's just that when I have so little time to write now, I really want to spend it on things which have so much more promise and are better-written. Sigh. Will have to figure out time to keep working on it, though.
ETA after reading a couple more stories written within the last six months: WHY. Why do I suck SO MUCH. *a v. furious headwall* And why did I actually SEND THESE to girls whose opinion MATTERS to me SO MUCH. AUUUUGH.
Thank God they lied, though, and told me they loved it, because I really couldn't have handled any other response in my extremely nervous state. ...Those two stories were of a new sort of hardcoreness.
Is this a snape/lily thing or is it a james/lilyBecause if its a Snape/Lily then ...no commentbut if its a James/Lily then its a good one
*cheerfully* Sorry, it's Lily/Severus all the way. That's my absolute favorite pairing and has been for nearly five years now, ever since I first entered fandom. This piece is really old, though, and not very well-written compared to what I can do now - I'm currently working on something much better that uses a lot of evidence from the sixth book to support them. I would really appreciate it if gave it a try when I do upload it, as I think you'll find it more convincing.
Thanks for reviewing, though I'm sorry you think its quality rests on which pairing it is.
Oh come to think of it the pairing seems interesting a bit like Hermione/Draco but snape isnt as good looking as draco is lol =P anyways I'm sorry if I offended you or anything but the story is good really
Heh, I do hope you know that we could find out at any moment in the books that Draco isn't good-looking at all. There's nothing in canon to support that; the conclusion is mostly drawn from Tom Felton and other popular fanfic stories.
Anyway, now is the time for me to confess myself so much a Ravenclaw that physical beauty is not the greatest factor I consider when loving a particular pairing. Intelligence, wit, and maturity (to some degree) are actually just about the most important qualities to me. And in those Severus (at least as a teenager, for relative maturity - compared to the Marauders' behavior, for example) succeeds greatly, which will always be why I find him hotter than Draco. ;)
Nah, you didn't offend me; I've heard worse insults to Lily/Severus over the years, you'll have to try harder than that. Thanks again, though I really don't like this piece very much at all anymore, and I would be delighted if you read my more thorough Lily/Severus story - titled "No Tears for Spilt Potions" - when I upload it, as the pairing might seem much more plausible to you then.